Friday, April 17, 2020

The GLOGblin

it's happening again. it has happened before and it its happening now and it will continue to happen and never stop happen. the glog metastasizes, the glog grows, the glog collapses under its weight and rots and births new glogs fed on its rotting flesh. the glog spreads. the glog mutates. the glog becomes more-than-glog. the glog apostasizes. the glog ascends to godhood, falls, rises, damns itself to an eternity of glog. it is the far future and there is only glog. any sufficiently advanced technoglogy is indistinguishable from divinity. praise. praise. sing and write and disgorge rules and templates and classes from your yawning maw. fear the goblins who bring the laws on stone tablets and scrolls of skin, for once you have read of their words you shall never escape.

i wrote this for april fool's day. it's a while later but yknow what, that only makes me more of a fool. time means nothing in quarantine anyway.

GLOG Author

Affront to God

portrait of the esteemed author as a young gob

Level 1: Blog, Oblogatory Cannibalism, 2 Blog Dice, 2 Classes
Level 2: Table Topper, +1 BD
Level 3: Blogroll, +1 BD
Level 4: GLOGhacker, +1 BD

Hit Die: d4
Starting Equipment: Set of polyhedral dice, nice pens, paper, map of the Tomb of the Serpent Kings (sans annotations), barbed spear (as spear, can lodge it in a hit target who takes 2 damage upon removing it)
Skills: 1. Poetry, 2. Squabbling, 3. Theft

Blog: You have a blog! Congratulations. Write some content for it! What's that, a class? Nice job! Everyone's gotta start somewhere. Either roll the classes that are on your Blog randomly on the BIG LIST, or pick ones you've actually written yourself on your real GLOG blog.

By scribbling madly and rolling any number of your Blog Dice (d6s), you can create a post that when read bestows (dice) templates (template A, then B, then C, then D, or levels 1/2/3/4) from a class on your blog upon its reader. It then crumbles into foul-smelling dust. Its abilities can be used (sum) times, and the reader may expend 5 uses from that reserve to create an appropriate resource die (like a Magic Die or a Rage Die) that they can use for those abilities. Blog Dice that land on a 4, 5, or 6 are expended.

Restore expended Blog Dice after a long rest.

Oblogatory Cannibalism: You can learn new classes and add them to your blog by eating someone of that class, or by eating another GLOGblin who's written that class.

Table Topper: You have seen the secret tables that the universe is played upon. Find a random table you like. Put it on your blog. When you would roll on a random table, you may expend a Blog Die to roll on a table on your Blog instead. Whenever a random table is rolled on (by a player or by the GM), you may expend a Blog Die. If you do, look at the table, and adjust the result by up to +/- the value you rolled. Whenever you level up, find a new random table to add to your Blog.

Blogroll: You can call upon the work of the GLOGblin collective, and write posts that gives a random class' templates from the BIG LIST. Roll the random class when the post is written.

GLOGhacker: You've written a whole dang GLOGhack! Good job, you. Post it up there and never run a game in another system ever again. You can bring its rules into the game. Restat your character in a GLOGhack of your choice (or your own). Play it in this one. You can enforce rules from that hack in any interaction your character is actively part of.

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